Be A Man

New years resolution: Be a man.

Rudyard Kipling
If 

If you can keep your head when all about you Are losing theirs and blaming it on you; If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you, But make allowance for their doubting too; If you can wait and not be tired by waiting, Or, being lied about, don't deal in lies, Or, being hated, don't give way to hating, And yet don't look too good, nor talk too wise; If you can dream - and not make dreams your master; If you can think - and not make thoughts your aim; If you can meet with triumph and disaster And treat those two imposters just the same; If you can bear to hear the truth you've spoken Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools, Or watch the things you gave your life to broken, And stoop and build 'em up with wornout tools; If you can make one heap of all your winnings And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss, And lose, and start again at your beginnings And never breath a word about your loss; If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew To serve your turn long after they are gone, And so hold on when there is nothing in you Except the Will which says to them: "Hold on"; If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue, Or walk with kings - nor lose the common touch; If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you; If all men count with you, but none too much; If you can fill the unforgiving minute With sixty seconds' worth of distance run - Yours is the Earth and everything that's in it, And - which is more - you'll be a Man my son!

Joie de Vivre!

   
        It started out with "what on earth is a transducer?" and then BAM! I was done my first semester. A celebratory blog post? I think so! My semester, like I'm sure all the rest of you, was crazy. I had 14 courses and thank goodness I didn't have finals in all of them. In all I wrote around 12 throughout the semester and boy am I ready to veg out for the next 2 weeks straight! When I got home from my exam today I did a little Christmas shopping. As I walked down the street I noticed people were smiling at me, and more than the polite curving of the lips. I realized I was beaming. I could not contain myself 'joie de vivre' was bursting from me. After all it was a very special evening.

      Tonight was roommate Christmas. Everyone made something. We had roast, mashed potatoes, gravy, sweet potatoes, broccoli salad, yorkshire puddings and about a million kinds of juices. Seriously, living like student kings! After everyone overindulged we exchanged secret Santa gifts. 

 Eve bought me mine and I loved it. It's a picture frame with all the quotes from kid history. Which is pretty much the best thing that has ever happened to me. Our house is obsessed. As Ariel puts it "We say our prayers, read our scriptures and watch 'Kid History'." Putting that beauty in my study corner for comic relief.

      After those festivities we piled in the car and drove to the legislature building to walk around and look at all the lights. It was magical. Skaters were dancing on the ice, music was playing everywhere and the lights dyed the snow. We had a fabulous time listening to a choir and sipping hot chocolate. 

    When it was time to leave though, Kyla reached into her pocket and no keys were to be found. Since the grounds at the legislature are rather extensive we began, very calmly, running in every direction. They were quickly found underneath the bridge. An odd place to look for keys yes, but say if you had been rolling under said bridge to get to the other side it would be a logical place to look. Not that we do childish things like that, just a lucky guess...

     Finally we reached home and of course the perfect way to end an evening like this is to jump in your pajamas and watch a movie (Elf). Of course cheesecake was involved as our Christmas dessert.

Life is so wonderful when the longer you live the larger your extended family gets. I love my roommates.

I also love my real family though, and the countdown is on: 18 hours folks. 18 blissful hours until I'm in those gorgeous, foggy, rained out mountains. 

Living On The Edge

   
      For most of my life the world has told me that I take the easy road. The one with the least risk and adventure. The trail that will eventually lead to where all others join, but with significantly fewer exciting uncertainties. I've heard stories about the paths others explore. And you know what? They do sound pretty exciting. Dancing the night away in dimly lit rooms with music pounding through your body. Having a good time with your friends drinking fruity concoctions that make your head spin. Sometimes slipping out of the house in a sleeveless little black dress for a night on the town. For years I've heard the screaming "take a chance, it'll be worth it!" And when that opportunity is passed up the world turns to mock me. "Square, goody two shoes, no sense of adventure. Too afraid to take a chance?"

Well now I have something to say about it: What I do is anything but easy. I live a life more on the edge than the world has ever offered me. Would it be risky to go to the club when asked? Maybe. But the real risky thing to do would be to face the opinion of my friends, peers and classmates. To see the disappointment in their eyes when I say I won't spend that time with them. To open my mouth and say no.

  I could have taken the chance when unexpectedly the most attractive, charismatic guy I know, who I've admired for pretty much my whole life, came calling my number. The world tells me this is the kind of risk to take. But the bigger gamble was telling myself no because I knew we didn't share the same standards.

   Tell me it was the easy life to wear knee length shorts in the sweltering hot summers. Or that looking for a one piece bathing suit while bikinis filled the sales bins was a breeze. Tell me that when I had to spend extra money for alterations on a graduation dress and to walk into a room of 700 and be the only one in a perceived 'old fashioned' sleeved-dress I wasn't taking a chance at being ridiculed.

   What is the greater challenge? Being like everyone else? No. It's standing out that presents the greatest opposition, that pushes us to our limits, and forces us to make far more perilous decisions than fitting in ever will. While future generations may remember you for your life, I would rather be honored for I stood for in it.

Dear World: Your act is in a rut. Step it up a notch. I'll be waiting for you on the edge of life. It's a risk worth taking.

Why Dogs Stopped Flying

This amused me. Also I miss my Lulu. 32 day countdown until I'm home for Christmas (and see my puppy)

Why Dogs Stopped Flying

Before humans,
dogs flew everywhere.
Their wings of silky fur
wrapped hollow bones.
Their tails wagged
like rudders through wind,
their stomachs bare
to the sullen earth.

Out of sorrow
for the first humans--
stumbling, crawling,
helpless and cold--
dogs folded their
great wings into paws
soft enough to walk
beside us forever.

They still weep for us,
pity our small noses,
our unfortunate eyes,
our dull teeth.

They lick our faces clean,
keep us warm at night.
Sometimes they remember flying
and bite our ugly hands.

-Kenneth W. Brewer

Perfect

     You know those girls who are absolutely, stunningly, without-a-doubt gorgeous? Perfect hair, perfect teeth, perfect clothes? The ones that everyone wants to be around all the time? They are beautiful when you first meet them but just appear more and more lovely as you get to know them because their insides, which are even more perfect and pure, show through  And try as you might to dislike how perfect they are, you can't because you just love them all too much. Well in my new school year I've met a girl who perfectly (of course) fits this description. She is kind to everyone and sees their potential. She listens and has an endless source of compassion and empathy. While yes her outfits are out of a magazine everyday, what makes her even more stunning is watching her concern for other bus passengers and standing to give away her seat. She's a smart cookie, but she takes the time to help others keep up to speed with the enormous workload we have. She inspires me in a new way every day.
       The other day this girl and I had a heart to heart. She told me about herself and her insecurities, the things that have gone wrong and I came to discover her life, much to my surprise, wasn't perfect.
I really got a lot from this experience. I have learned:

1. Beauty, I truly and honestly believe, comes from who you are. I've never gotten to know someone, who is a wonderful person, and then thought they were physically unattractive. It has definitely worked the opposite way though. There is beauty in everyone.

2. No one's life anywhere is perfect. It's not avoiding hardship, but what you do with it that makes you incredible.

3. Everyone feel insecure to a degree.

4. Your actions, though they may seem small and insignificant are noticed. People are watching. Although they may never say anything the things you say and do can change perspectives, opinions and lives.

5. People, not matter how much you think they are, are not perfect. And isn't that a comfort!